i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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