Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
