Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
