How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
