i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
