Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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