tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize