Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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