the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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