I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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