once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
