bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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