Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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