do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Acid is not a monday night drug
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
