So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
