i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
