I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
