absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
no, he came in my armpit
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize