mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
