Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
whose parrot is this?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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