so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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