were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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