took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
