Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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