I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
