it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize