why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
