chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
