Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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