I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
