woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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