i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
