My first STD was from a foam party
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
