it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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