Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize