I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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