my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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