PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize