IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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