ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Pants 0. Shit 1.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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