Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize