he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
