I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
