it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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