On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
