Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Your dad touched me again.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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