I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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