im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
