And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
