if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
A+ Viking dick
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
