Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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