i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
